Throwing away outs

This has been a busy week and I felt like talking about something other than the law today, so here we go. Last Saturday night I took my girls to go see the Astros play the Padres.  It was a defensive duel through nine innings that ended with the Astrols winning on one of the flukiest plays I've ever seen.

But what I wanted to talk about was what happened when the Padres were at bat in the top of the 5th innining in a scoreless game (played with a DH since it was in Houston). The lead-off hitter for the Padres reached second on a ground-rule double. Not bad - man on second, nobody out. The next batter laid down a bunt and moved the runner to third with one out. The runner on third took off toward home and was caught in a rundown when the third baseman fielded a grounder. The batter advanced to second. So, after a sacrifice and a groundout, San Diego was in the same situation they were in before with a man on second - but now there were two outs. Gerritt Cole struck out the next batter and the Astros were out of the inning.

The following day the Texas Longhorns were hosting the Baylor Bears. Going into the top of the 7th, Texas was leading 3-1. Baylor got the first two batters on base with nobody out. The next batter squared to bunt. He bunted up the third base line and the Longhorn third baseman threw out the lead runner at third. The next batter flew out. Baylor now found themselves in a familiar position - men on first and second, only this time there were two outs. After a wild pitch the Longhorns got the third out and escaped unscathed. Texas went on to win the game and sweep the series.

In both games teams made the decision to attempt to bunt a runner to third with nobody out. And in both instances they traded first and second with nobody out for first and second with two outs.

In both instances the manager were wrong.

As Billy Beane pointed out in Moneyball, outs are precious commodities for a baseball team. You only get 27 of them -- and then only three at a time. Throwing one away and getting nothing for it in return is a bad tactic - especially when we're talking about two games in which DH's were used.

I can understand a manager calling for a pitcher to lay down a bunt to advance a runner since the pitcher is extremely unlikely to get a hit, but when the pitchers aren't batting it makes little or no sense to send a batter into the box for the sole purpose of squaring up and laying down a bunt. In both games, it would have made infinitely more sense to send the batter to the plate to swing away.

Jim Crane's secrets to successfully running a baseball team (into the ground)

Well, as we get nearer and nearer to the real Opening Day in Cincinnati, it's probably about time we took a little time to look at the prospects of our beloved Houston Disastros. The club is coming off an unbelievable three-year run of 100+ losses and looking to make it four-in-a-row.

But where to begin? First we have Jim Crane dealing with the grease fire that is the sports network the Astros set up with the Rockets and Comcast. The teams got together to create their own regional sports network because they thought the rights fees Fox was paying wasn't what the market would bear.

The Rockets have been a mediocre team for years and, while popular, the asking price for cable and satellite companies to carry Rockets' games was, shall we say, on the pricey side. As for the Astros - let's just say when you've had back-to-back 100+ loss seasons you aren't exactly bargaining from the best position.

The sports network is now in bankruptcy and Jim Crane is attempting to get the Astros out from under the wreckage while the Rockets are hoping a carriage deal will be worked out through the bankruptcy proceedings. As things stand currently, only about 40% of the Houston market has access to the channel.

This thing spiraled out of control because the Astros got greedy. The former owner, Drayton McLane, got the ball rolling figuring the team could make more money selling commercials during the broadcasts than by selling the television package to a third party. But the situation was a bit more complicated than that.

The Astros and the Rockets both own roughly 40% of the network and Comcast owns the remaining portion. The network was supposed to pay the rights fees to the teams and broadcast the games. To date the network owes millions of dollars to both teams in unpaid broadcast rights fees - but the network doesn't owe the teams nearly the amount they claim because both teams are, to some degree, paying themselves to broadcast the games.

The Astros also find themselves in hot water over the way they've treated young outfield hotshot George Springer. Mr. Springer was Houston's most potent AAA player last year and should have been playing on the expanded 40-man roster in September. But, instead, he found himself playing in Oklahoma City as the season wound to an end. It was just a bit odd that a team struggling to beat anyone down the stretch would leave their best prospect off the roster when the season was already a lost cause. Even more odd is that Mr. Springer was optioned back down to Oklahoma City during spring training when the Astros are looking at another cellar-run in 2014. Something just wasn't adding up.

It turns out that the Astros offered Mr. Springer a 7-year contract worth about $23 million in September. The deal was intended to lock in Mr. Springer for a number of years at a (fairly) low cost. Mr. Springer turned down the offer because he didn't want to get stuck in a very team-friendly contract throughout his 20's. He wanted a shorter deal for more money so that he would have a chance to test the free agency waters as he was hitting his prime.

But once he rejected the Astros' offer, Mr. Springer was left at AAA while the dumpster fire that was the 2013 Houston Astros continued to burn. One reason for leaving Mr. Springer off the expanded roster in September was to keep his major league service days low in order to keep him from becoming "arbitration-eligible" a year before the Astros wanted. Now the Players' Association is looking into the way the Astros handled the situation. The interesting thing is that Mr. Springer was never a member of the union because he had never played in a major league contest during the regular season.

Finally, after purchasing a mini-ticket package last season I was looking forward to doing it again this year. My package included Opening Day and one game a month during the season. Our seats were in the mezzanine in center field right underneath the giant scoreboard. But when I got a call from a ticket rep back in January I was disappointed to find that the package I subscribed to last year wasn't being offered this season. There was another package that included Opening Day (which has become a tradition for my oldest daughter) but something wasn't right.

For one, seats in the mezzanine area weren't being offered. The other problem was the price. When the ticket rep asked me if I'd be interested in signing up for the new package I asked her if the Astros were still charging "dynamic" pricing for the package (which means more money for games against popular teams and a shitload more for Opening Day). She told me that they weren't.

But when I went to the Astros website I found a different story. For more that what I paid last year for my package I could get the new package in worse seats. For a lot more I could get tickets in good seats. I told her thanks, but no thanks. I've got better things to do with my money that pay more money to see a crappy team. So, for the first time in about five years, my oldest daughter and I will not be attending Opening Day. Thanks, Jim Crane.

Crane's idea of operating a baseball team is to bleed everyone dry bit-by-bit. As I wrote last year, so-called dynamic pricing is a way to squeeze more money out of fans to see the away team. Strangely enough, even though the prices go up when a popular team comes to town, they never drop below the base value when a dog comes to town to play - even though there will be thousands of empty seats when the dregs of the American League set foot on the field.

I figure there's no way in hell the Astros will lose 100+ games for a fourth year running. I think they can knock the loss total into the 90's this season (which is still nothing to be proud of). But I do predict that Jim Crane will make out like a bandit thanks to the network television money that is divided up among the teams. So long as the Astros' payroll is under $45 million, Jim Crane will make money without selling a single ticket.

And that is Jim Crane's definition of success.

Fantasy baseball comes a-calling

With pitchers and catchers due to report for the Houston Astros tomorrow - in what can only be described as the uncut version of the Bataan death march - it seems like a fitting time to put out the call for the 2014 Criminal Defense Lawyers Invitational Fantasy Baseball League.

The league is a basic 5 x 5 league with an auto draft that we run through Yahoo! Just keep in mind, however, that we use OPS and not batting average as one of our metrics.

Last year's winner, Vik Vij, even switched sides during the season, moving out of the Galveston County DA's Office into an office that requires making money in order to pay those things we like to call bills. Welcome to the club, my friend.

I will be extending invitations to everyone who participated last season and will be more than happy to accept some new members to our little fraternity. If you're interested in playing, just shoot me an e-mail, send me a tweet (@PaulBKennedy) or leave a comment and I'll get the information out to you.

Burnt ends

For those barbecue enthusiasts out there, y'all know that the burnt ends refer to the tips of briskets that have been smoked for hours in a smoker. The burnt ends are tasty little meat nuggets that are crispy and charred and full of smoky goodness.

And, so, here are some burnt ends for today...

The Elevator Troll

Last week I tried a DWI case in Harris County. Ordinarily I park along the street a couple blocks away from Minute Maid Park and walk five or six blocks to the criminal courthouse. On trial days, however, I park in the county parking garage and take the tunnel into the courthouse so I don't have to worry about rain.

So there I am, pulling my cart behind me, walking through the tunnel complex until I get to the criminal courthouse. I go in the door and down the hallway toward the elevators. There are two elevators that travel to the basement of the building. One is a normal elevator that goes up to the 10th floor (there are 20 floors in the courthouse). That elevator is accessible to anyone.

The other elevator has a keypad next to the call button that only those with county badges can access. That elevator is special - it goes all the way to the top of the building so you don't have to change elevators on the 10th floor.

On this particular day the regular elevator wasn't working so everyone who entered through the tunnel got to use the "employee" elevator. Inside was the elevator troll, er, attendant. On the ground floor someone with the company that provides courthouse security got on. The fun began when the attorney who got on board with me in the basement stepped out of the car in order for someone in back to get out. When he stepped back in the security person asked if he had a badge.

He said that he was an attorney who got on the elevator in the basement and that he didn't have a courthouse badge. She tried to tell him that this was an employees-only elevator and that he was only given the privilege of riding the elevator because the other one was broken. He told her that the elevators belonged to the county, not the DA's office, and that anyone should be able to ride them. She took offense to the logic of his argument, but couldn't come up with anything intelligent to say.

After the attorney got off the elevator, someone looked toward the elevator troll, er, attendant, and tried to apologize for the lawyer's behavior. The consensus seemed to be that he was a jerk to insist that since the elevator was built with county funds that the residents of Harris County were entitled to use it. As I stepped out on my floor I turned around and told the elevator troll, er, attendant, that the other lawyer was right.

This notion that someone employees of the courts and the DA's office are entitled to special privileges because they work for the county is absurd. We all pay their salaries. We all pay the bills to keep the lights on and the elevators functioning. There is already a vast gulf between those who prosecute crimes and the folks who come in and out of the courthouse on a daily basis. Walling them off further by allowing them to use a special elevator while defendants and defenders wait around in a crowded lobby for the rest of the elevators distorts their perspective even more.

No 163rd Game in Fantasy Baseball

This past weekend was final weekend of the Criminal Defense Lawyers Invitational Fantasy Baseball League. This year's champion - who led it from start to finish - is former Galveston County prosecutor Vik Vij. Mr. Vij left the DA's office during the course of the season to open a criminal defense practice. I think it was because he was afraid he'd be disqualified if he stayed with the DA's office.

Congratulations, Vik.

Death of a Legend



In 1969 college football celebrated its centennial year. The final weekend of the college football season say two undefeated teams square off in The Game of the Century. President Richard Nixon was on hand in Fayetteville as the top-ranked Texas Longhorns squared off with the second-ranked Arkansas Razorbacks.

For three quarters it looked as though the home team would prevail. As the fourth quarter began the Razorbacks had a 14-0 lead and things were bleak for the visitors.

On the first play of the fourth quarter Texas quarterback James Street scrambled for a touchdown. Darrell Royal then sent the offense back on the field to attempt a two-point conversion. The decision had been made long before Street found the end zone. Coach Royal's gamble paid off and the lead was cut to 14-8.

After intercepting a Razorback pass in the end zone the Horns drove down the field but got bogged down near midfield with a fourth-and-three. Coach Royal called for a long pass to the tight end Randy Peschel. Street delivered the ball, Peschel hauled it in and two plays later Texas scored what would prove to be the winning points.

James Street died yesterday of a heart attack. Rest in pace, James, you will forever be a Texas legend.

Going to the bank

As you might expect, once word went out that the Houston Astros were on track to bag $99 million this year, someone with the ball club had to get up and say it wasn't so.

The Astros, who own the worst record in Major League Baseball, have the lowest payroll of any team after getting rid of just about anyone who makes anything approaching serious money. The two exceptions are Jose Altuve (who just signed a long-term deal) and Eric Bedard (I can only suppose he's got some serious dirt on Jim Crane).

According to Forbes magazine, the Astros are on pace to bring in more money in 2013 than the last eight World Series champions combined. The number may be a bit high because it doesn't take into account the bath that the Astros took as a stakeholder in CSN-Houston, the regional sports network they started up with the Rockets. But, even factoring in a $24 million loss, the Astros are still pulling in over $70 million this season.

Team president Reid Ryan (son of one of the greatest pitchers of all time) told everyone who would listen that Forbes didn't know what they were talking about. He insisted that the Astros were losing money.

Here's a link to Jim Crane claiming he's losing money hand-over-fist.

Now, if he were arguing that the Astros weren't making as much as Forbes estimated, I might buy into his argument. But, to argue that the number is off by more than $100 million is really stretching it.

I understand why Mr. Ryan stood up to deny the report. If I were the president of the worst ball club in baseball, I wouldn't want folks to know just how much money we were raking in. If I were the president of the ball club with the lowest payroll in baseball, I wouldn't want folks to know how much money we were raking in.

The scary thing is these numbers don't even reflect the windfall every Major League team will reap from the new national TV contracts beginning next season.

The numbers from Forbes are further evidence that Jim Crane has no intention of putting a winning product out on the field. Why spend the money on high-priced free agents when you can field a bunch of rookies and players too good for Triple A but not good enough for the Majors and still make money hand over fist?

Yes, it's Mr. Crane's money - but we aren't talking about a small market team here. Houston is the nation's fourth largest city and home to countless major corporations. There is plenty of money in Houston to field a competitive team. But that's not the game plan.

So, Houston, sit back and enjoy your AAAA ball club scrap and fight to keep from losing 100 games year after year. Meanwhile, Jim Crane and his buds will be sitting back and raking in the cash - whether you go to the ballpark or not.

***

Here's an article from another writer at Forbes who says the claim the Astros were swimming in cash was wrong.

Of course there are all sorts of ways to cook the books to make them say whatever you want them to say, too.

Has it really been five years already?

Today marks a couple of landmarks in the world of The Defense Rests. It was five years ago today that the first post went out across the interwebz. And this is my 2,000th post on this blawg. So, today we won't talk about the law; instead we will talk about two of my favorite subjects - baseball and soccer.

First we go to the diamond where today is judgment day for Alex Rodriguez. Mr. Rodriguez, for those of y'all who don't keep up with such things, was implicated in the latest drug scandal to hit baseball. His name was found in records belonging to the Biogenesis clinic in Florida. Ryan Braun of the Milwaukee Brewers (who escaped punishment just a year ago) has already agreed to a 65 game suspension that will keep him off the field for the rest of the 2013 season.

Mr. Rodriguez, who has denied any wrongdoing, has refused to negotiate the terms of a suspension with MLB. As a result he is looking at a suspension that could last anywhere from 200 games to life. If he decides to sit down to work out an exit strategy he is likely to sit the rest of this season and all of next season - costing him almost $40 million.

His employer, the New York Yankees, are, ironically, hoping that the commissioner will drop the hammer on A-Rod as that would free up a lot of cash in the Bronx.

Either way, Alex Rodriguez' career is coming to an end. He is 38 years old with lots of miles on his body. He is coming off hip surgery in the off-season. He, and his salary, are an albatross around the neck of the Yankees.

Now I've questioned many times before this focus we have on players who took performance enhancing drugs. Sports is big business. Networks buy up broadcast and cable rights for hundreds of millions of dollars. They want a lot of eyeballs watching those games so they can charge their sponsors and arm and a leg for the privilege of airing a commercial or two during the game.

No one in baseball seemed to care back in 1998 when Mark McGwire and Sammy Sosa were chasing history. The aura of the home run chase served to restore the luster the game had lost when the World Series was cancelled in 1994. Mr. McGwire looked like a freak of nature - nothing like the kid who began his big league career in Oakland.

As a result of their cheating, neither McGwire nor Sosa is likely to ever be enshrined in Cooperstown.

Then along came Barry Bonds, whose head kept getting bigger and bigger (literally) as a result of the drugs he was using to fuel his pursuit of Hank Aaron's all-time home run record. Despite the fact everyone knew Bonds was the biggest cheat in baseball, we were still subjected to the sight of Hank Aaron recording a message congratulating Mr. Bubblehead on becoming the new home run king.

Bonds was never suspended and his records still hold. It is unlikely that he will be invited to the Hall of Fame anytime soon, either. The only consolation in all of this is that while everyone who follows baseball knows what 755 means, very few folks can remember how many homeruns Bonds hit.

As the extent of drug use became clear, baseball decided to clean up its act. The owners and the players' union worked together to create a new drug policy that called for mandatory suspensions for players who tested positive for a banned substance. But, none of the players caught up in the Biogenesis scandal tested positive for anything - the evidence against them consists of medical and billing records and the statements of the "doctor" who ran the clinic out of a strip mall.

So, is it fair that Mr. Braun, Mr. Rodriguez and the other players are being punished for their alleged drug use while Bonds, McGwire, Sosa, Clemens and others weren't? No, it's probably not. Of course the problem is that back when the drug scandals began, there was no drug policy in baseball and now there is. Mr. Rodriguez cheated knowing full well that he was cheating and what the possible penalties were.

Drugs brought baseball back from the brink of oblivion and the owners and commissioner turned their heads the other way so long as the money was pouring into the coffers. Now, with baseball being richer than it has ever been before, MLB wants to crack down on the practices it condoned 15 years ago.

On the other side of the world, in Qatar to be exact, a young Ecuadoran soccer player, Christian Benitez died of heart failure shortly after playing in his first match for his new club in Qatar. His death has raised serious questions regarding FIFA's awarding of the 2022 World Cup to the Arab emirate.

FIFA officials are now, all of a sudden, worried about the consequences of playing a soccer tournament in a country in which temperatures exceed well over 100 degrees during the summer. Even Sepp Blatter, the corrupt head of FIFA, is considering moving the tournament from the summer to the winter to avoid the searing heat (nevermind the havoc that will play on European soccer leagues). With all the hand wringing after Mr. Benitez' death you would think that Qatar was lush paradise turned into an arid desert wasteland in the last few months as a result of global warming.

The truth is that no one in FIFA gave a flying fuck about the weather and playing conditions for players or fans. The decision was made based on who promised to make FIFA the most money - and Qatar, a country rich in soccer tradition (or not), promised the moon.

Why shouldn't Puig be an All-Star?

Yasiel Puig is a rookie for the Los Angeles Dodgers who defected from Cuba last year. His first full month in the majors was the best for any rookie other than Joe DiMaggio. Currently he has a .407 batting average and an on-base percentage of .441. He is one of the candidates for the final spot on the National League's All Star roster. People who wouldn't ordinarily watch baseball are tuning in to see him play.

As the fans have been swept up in Puig-mania, there are those pundits of the sacred game who think it would be a travesty if a rookie with barely a month's time in the big leagues were to play in the Midsummer Night Classic. Critics, among them Philadelphia closer Jonathan Papelbon, say it would make a joke of the All-Star game if Puig were to make the roster.

“The guy’s got a month, I don’t even think he’s got a month in the big leagues, and just comparing him to this and that, and saying he’s going to make the all-star team, that’s a joke to me. It’s just really what happens in baseball when… to me it really does an injustice to the veteran players that have been in the game for eight, nine, ten plus years, and it kind of does them an injustice because they’ve worked so hard to stay there.” - Jonathan Papelbon

No, what makes the All-Star game a joke is that, thanks to Bud Selig, home field advantage in the World Series is granted to the team from the league that wins an exhibition game. Back in the day the All-Star Game meant something. It was the only time, other than the World Series, that you could see players from both leagues on the same field at the same time.

Interleague play killed that.

The game has become a joke on its own as the starters play no more than a couple of innings before bench players begin making their appearances. It has become more important for a manager to get all of his players in the game than it is to win the game. That's what led to the dreaded tie game a few years ago - in the rush to get everyone in the game the managers left themselves with no one on the bench as the game headed into extra innings.

The joke isn't that the most astounding rookie in years might get a spot on the roster. The joke is that a game that could be decided in the late innings with the starters long gone will determine who gets home field advantage when the World Series comes along in October.

And just how do you define successful?

Last weekend we went up to Conroe to hang out with the folks and celebrate my younger brother's birthday.  And, of course, at some point the conversation drifted to the pathetic state of major league baseball in Houston.

My mom told me that a hairdresser friend of hers was cutting the hair of someone whose relative knew Astros' owner Jim Crane or who knew some relative of Crane's or something along those lines. Well, the gist of the story was that Jim Crane had always been a successful businessman (well, let's just forget about those EEOC problems and that whole war-profiteering mess) and that this man had faith that Crane would be successful in turning around the Astros.

My mom took this to be a sign of hope that one day the Astros might just contend for the playoffs again (or win more than they lost).

Not wanting to be the one to burst my mom's bubble I pointed out that there are two measures of success when one owns a sports team - making money and winning championships. Jim Crane would have to be one of the world's worst businessmen not to make a profit with the Astros.

I pointed out that the upcoming broadcast rights would be worth somewhere in the neighborhood of $40 million or so per team. And that's before selling a single ticket. I told her he had no incentive to go out and spend money on players because with the current payroll he stands to make millions a year doing absolutely nothing.

Now there's little chance the Astros will be as bad as they are now for the foreseeable future. They will improve over time - but don't count on Crane opening up the checkbook to buy free agent talent anytime soon. In fact, be prepared to see the best and brightest young players traded off before they become eligible for arbitration.

Yes, Jim Crane will be successful. He will make money hand-over-fist. Unfortunately, his metric of success isn't winning ballgames.

Another drug scandal in baseball? Wake me when it's over

Another day, another steroid (or whatever the performance enhancing drug of the day is) scandal. Stars such as Ryan Braun and Alex Rodriguez have found themselves wrapped up in a mess involving drugs obtained from a strip-center anti-aging clinic in Florida.

For Mr. Braun, this is his second run-in with MLB's anti-drug policy. The first time he skated because of chain of custody issues with his sample. I have a feeling this second episode will not go as well for the Brewer outfielder as the first one.

The big question, however, isn't whether or not the players involved cheated, the big question is whether or not it matters. You see, once upon a time numbers mattered in baseball. We all knew what 7, 56, 61, .406, 714 and 755 meant. We collected baseball cards and pored over the stats on the back... and then tried to chew the pink cardboard that passed as gum.

But somewhere along the line the game became less about those precious numbers and more about revenue.

In the meantime, Mark McGwire, and later Barry Bonds, broke the single-season home run mark using banned substances. Barry Bonds broke Hank Aaron's career home run record while juicing. And, just to show how little the numbers mean these days, how many of y'all know how many career homers Barry Bonds hit?

Ballparks have become smaller in order to encourage more offense. Strike zones have become smaller in order to force pitchers to throw in the butter zone. The playoffs (once the most elite status is sports) have become diluted with expansion and the creation of the wild card. And don't even get me started on the blasphemy that is interleague play.

Baseball isn't about history and numbers anymore. It's about entertainment. Baseball competes with other sports but it also competes with the movies, concerts, theater and backyard barbecues. As a result of the high fees networks pay to broadcast games, the games have stretched out longer and longer to accommodate all the commercial breaks necessary to pay the bills.

So, in the end, does it really matter if a ballplayer is sticking a needle up his butt or rubbing some cream on his muscles or popping pills? It's all about entertaining the fans.

And there's nothing wrong with that. Come Sunday I'll be sitting out in the mezzanine with my old man celebrating Father's Day.

Instant replay and the death of the spitball

Replay? Are y'all really certain y'all want instant replay in baseball?

At its core, baseball is entertainment. Yes, it's a sport and who wins matters -- but we go to the ballpark and flip on the television set to be entertained. The Astros are putrid. My girls still enjoy going to the games. Hell, I still enjoy going out to the ballpark to watch a game.

Unlike any other sport in this country, baseball has a past that matters. Sure, there have been changes to the game - longer seasons, different mound heights, smaller strike zones and ballparks with cheap porches - but the numbers still matter.

Everyone knows what 714 means. We know the importance of 715 and 755. The Ryan Express fired off seven no-hitters over his career. Gaylord Perry, the greatest spitballer of all time, is in Cooperstown. Ty Cobb was one of the dirtiest players ever - he's also in the Hall of Fame.

Over the years the adage has been that if you ain't cheating, you ain't playing to win. Baserunners steal signs. Catchers cheat the corners with their gloves. The runner is out at second if the fielder is "in the neighborhood" of the bag. Bats are corked. Goop is slathered under the bill of a ball cap. Metal grommets on gloves are filed to a point. Sunscreen and rosin are mixed on the pitcher's non-throwing arm. Foul lines are sloped. Grass is cut at different lengths.

It's all part of the game. It's part of the show. The idea has always been to try to find that one little edge that can help you hit the ball or get it past the batter.Cheating has always been a part of the game. It's an unwritten rule that provided you don't step over that imaginary line, everyone will look the other way.

I can never forget the look on George Brett's face when the Yankees skipper asked the umpire to measure how far up the bat Brett had smeared pine tar. The rule was you can slather that puppy up so long as it wasn't up the bat more than the distance across home plate. Of course batters pushed the envelope. And no one said a thing because the pitchers were doctoring the baseballs.

But after Brett hit his shot over the outfield fence, someone decided to enforce the rule and Brett was called out after the umpire put the bat down across home plate. Brett was livid.

He wasn't pissed because he was innocent. He was pissed because someone from the other team crossed an imaginary line and ratted him out.

And now someone wants instant replay? Don't they realize if we start using the eye in the sky to check on balls and strikes, bang-bang plays and whether a ball is fair or foul that someone's going to want to take a look at what the pitcher's doing in his glove or behind his back. Someone might see something funny with that bat and want to take a closer look.

Are you sure you want to go there?

Astros at the quarter-pole

We are now a quarter of the way through the 2013 major league baseball season and the Houston Astros are stinking up the joint even worse than expected. Somewhat unexpected is the number of times that new owner Jim Crane has stepped in it.

First it was his dynamic pricing model. Then he jumped on the fans because they wanted to spend his money on better players. And then, just this past week, he axed the Astros Wives' charity gala.

As an aside, after seeing the Astros blow a 4-2 eighth inning lead in Bad News Bears's style last night, I was struck by manager Bo Porter's decision to put Hector Ambriz on the mound in relief. I mean, what could possibly go wrong when you trot out a relief pitcher who puts on an average of almost two runners an inning?

Through 22 homes dates thus far, the Astros rank 26th in attendance. Minute Maid Park holds around 43,000 people - to date the Astros are averaging 19,445 per game. And that's tickets sold, not fannies in the seats.

That tells me that Crane's dynamic pricing scheme isn't working. The idea (at one point) was that ticket prices in certain sections of the stadium would fluctuate according to demand. Theoretically, when overall attendance is down ticket prices would go down and vice versa.

Under the Crane model prices never go down. As I've written before, the Crane model charges fans based on who the Astros are playing. When the Yankees and Red Sox come to town ticket prices go way up. They go up a little bit when the Rangers come to Houston. But prices never fall below the face value for anybody else. Take a look at those attendance numbers and you can figure out what's wrong with the Crane plan.

Going forward the national television deals will net each club over $40 million. That figure doesn't include local television and radio rights. It also doesn't include stadium revenue. Crane can make a fortune if he can trot out a team with a payroll under $30 million. And I wager that's what he intends to do.

So, my advice to everyone who likes baseball is to come out to see Bud Norris and Jose Altuve play because chances are neither will be with the team by the end of the season. Don't say you haven't been warned.

Upon further review...

Jeff Passan over at Yahoo! Sports is beating the drum for expanded instant replay in baseball. And, for the sake of the game, I hope he doesn't get it.

No one likes bad calls, Jeff, but they are a part of the game. But, the very structure of baseball makes it a very poor candidate for instant replay. There are few natural breaks in a baseball game. Football, on the other hand, is tailor-made for instant replay. In college football an extra official sits in the press box and reviews each and every play and notifies the officials on the field if a replay needs a closer look.

Every umpire misses a bang-bang play at a base during the course of a game. It's inevitable. In those instances he almost has to make up his mind before the play is even completed whether he's calling the runner out or safe. It just so happens that sometimes plays don't end up quite the way the man in blue anticipated.

Should replay be utilized to make certain those calls were correct? It's probably not a bad idea. There aren't that many of those plays during the course of a regular game and the disruption to the flow of play shouldn't be too bad.

But where are we going to draw the line? Right now the line is drawn to determining whether a hit was a home run or not. But those, too, are rare controversies. The biggest area of concern is what happens behind the plate. Calling balls and strikes has much more impact on the game than any other call an umpire makes. That umpire crouching behind the catcher has the ability to make the strike zone bigger or smaller from day-to-day. Just how much of the outside corner is he going to give? What about those pitches that come in belt-high? Is the zone going to extend to the top of the knee or the bottom?

Just how would Mr. Passan propose we handle the calling of pitches? Who would make that decision? From what angle would they make it? Would every pitch be subject to review or just those calls the managers didn't like? Who would make the ultimate call - an umpire in the press box, an umpire in New York or the crew on the field?

And just how much more time would this add on to games that are already taking far too long to play. The problem isn't pitchers taking their own sweet time between pitches. It isn't batters stepping out of the batter's box between every pitch. It isn't managers overmanaging their pitching staffs. Nope, the problem is the number of commercials that air between innings and during pitching changes.

In order to justify the ever-escalating cost of airing major league baseball, cable and broadcast networks are trying to put more and more commercials into their telecasts. As a result, games are lasting longer and longer with no end in sight. Expanding the use of instant replay will only make the situation worse.

Mr. Passan points to two incidents that occurred last week as justifications to expand the use of instant replay - a disputed home run and the ignoring of a rule.

The Oakland A's lost a game last week because the umpires ruled a home run to be but a double off the top of the wall. The replay clearly showed that the ball went over the wall and that the game should have been knotted up. However, after blowing the call the first time, the crew watched the replays and proceeded to uphold their decision. So much for instant replay getting it right.



In the second incident, umpires allowed the Houston Astros to make a pitching change before the pitcher on the mound had even faced a batter. Oops. The rules state that a pitcher must pitch to at least one batter before he can be taken out of the game. Ultimately it made no difference because, the Astros being the Astros, Houston lost the game. In that instance there was nothing expanded instant replay could do - the problem was an umpire who didn't know the rules.

I love baseball but it's gotten to the point where it's next to impossible for me to sit down and watch a game on TV because of how much time it takes to watch. I'm much happier sitting in the stands soaking up the atmosphere and eating sunflower seeds.

Expanded instant replay is the last thing baseball needs. We need to be looking at ways to shorten games, not lengthen them. Besides, unless you replace the home plate umpire with a high-speed camera and a computer, you are only addressing superficial issues. There is no way to make replay work in the context of baseball and it's time we stop trying.

There have always been bad calls in baseball and I'm fairly certain there always will be. But, over the course of a game, a series or the season, the bad calls tend to even themselves out. Let's not make baseball even more unwatchable by expanding instant replay.

A lawyer goes to a ballgame...

Okay, I'm up in Arlington for a seminar. I spent the evening at the Ballpark (more or less) watching the Rangers lose to the White Sox. More on that later.

First, I want to make a shout out to Marilous Auer for pointing out a huge error I made in post reviewing the book Color Blind. I meant to say that my oldest daughter thought it was stupid that blacks weren't allowed to play in the majors before 1947 - but that's not what I typed. Marilou pointed out the fact I had left out the word "not" in my post.

Without that word the post totally missed the point I was trying to make. Kids don't make the distinction of races that adults do. They just want to play and they don't care about what color someone's skin is. We could learn so much by watching our kids play and interact with one another.

And that brings me to this morning's topic. Last night I went to the Ballpark in Arlington to watch the Texas Rangers play - not because I care one whit about the Rangers but because I thought it would be fun to watch a game as a neutral observer in a strange ballpark.

Before I get into the circumstances surrounding last night's game I do want to say that the Ballpark is a beautiful place to watch a ballgame. The Rangers got it right when they designed their digs. It has an old-timey feel from both the outside and the inside. Of course, since it was all of 43 degrees when the game started, I realized how much I missed Minute Maid Park (for all its faults) because it is enclosed.

I had tickets in the club section but, unlike in Houston, the club section is not enclosed in Arlington. There are a couple of bars that are enclosed (and warm) but the club level is open (and cold). I remember the first time I took my youngest daughter to a ballgame (it was my wife's parent's 65th wedding anniversary). She wasn't quite a year old and cranky as hell. I spent a good deal of time sitting in the back of a bar with her on my chest watching the game and drinking like a fish.

Before I left Houston I went online via MLB's At Bat app to get a ticket but no matter how hard I tried I couldn't get it to work right. I ended up having to buy my ticket on my computer instead (my phone seemed to think I wanted to purchase four tickets in the bleachers instead of one in the club section). I was given the option of having my ticket information sent via text message which I thought would be quite convenient. Unfortunately my cell carrier blocked my receiving or sending text messages to the short numbers.

I called my carrier and had the block lifted and then sent a text to the ticket seller to resend the ticket information. Nothing. Then I sent another request. Again I received nothing.

I called the number on the e-mail and was told there was not a damn thing that could be done about it. So I printed out my ticket before I left the office. But I had paid another $2.50 for the privilege of having a text message sent to my phone with all the necessary information. I asked the customer service rep if I could get my $2.50 back since the company's FAQ pages regarding cell phone tickets were nowhere to be found.

Believe it or not, I was told there was nothing the ticketing agent could do and that I would have to deal with the Rangers' ticket people to get my money back. I wish I could say I was surprised. Maybe that's the price that I pay for using a two-and-a-half year old android phone (no sense in buying a new one if the old one is working).

So there we are. I had a good time in a different ballpark  - thank goodness I finally got into the bar because it was awfully damn cold tonight - but I do have a gripe about the entire ticketing process. I also have a greater appreciation for Minute Maid Park (although it still feels fake).

I'm going to go now so I can listen to the rest of the Astros' game tonight (they're in the 12th inning as I write). Have a great day.

Who's really to blame for network fiasco?

So now Houston mayor Annise Parker has decided to get herself in the middle of the fray between the Astros and Rockets' regional sports networks and satellite and cable TV providers. According to Mayor Parker, the fact that the network is available to no more than 40% of Houston cable and satellite subscribers is "intolerable." So, to break the impasse she has invited representatives from the sports network, DirecTV, AT&T and Suddenlink to sit down and work it out.

“The proud followers of our Houston teams – many of whom have paid for the venues where the Astros, Dynamo and Rockets compete – have been patient as your negotiations with Comcast SportsNet Houston have unfolded,” Parker wrote. “That said, as the Rockets push toward the NBA playoffs and the Astros and Dynamo seasons get underway, the situation is intolerable.”

Most telling is her comment about who paid for the stadiums in which the teams play. When these multi-million dollar playpens were built, the public was told the bill would be paid by folks who came to town and stayed in hotels and rented cars. Well, that's not entirely correct. Local government officials agreed to finance the stadiums and placed an additional tax on hotel rooms and rental cars. That additional tax was supposed to cover the costs of the stadiums. But, should those tax revenues fall below the level necessary to pay off the bondholders, who do you think is responsible for coughing up the balance?

In her pandering to the owners of the franchises, Mayor Parker seems to have forgotten that both the Astros and the Rockets had existing deals with one of Fox Sports' regional networks to televise their games. The Dynamo had no broadcast outlet for the majority of their games. The Fox network was available on all cable and satellite systems as part of a basic (or expanded basic - whatever the hell that means) subscription.

The ownership of the Astros and Rockets made the decision to go in with NBC Sports to create their own regional sports channel in hopes of making more money than they made with Fox. In order to bring in the revenue, the network has asked cable and satellite providers for a certain amount of money per subscriber. The providers say the asked for price is too expensive for them to make the channel available for basic packages.

Yes, the providers are trying to bid down the price so they can make more money carrying the channel. But the lion share of the blame must rest on the Astros and the Rockets for being greedy. The Astros have spent the last two seasons in the cellar and will likely sit on the basement sofa eating Cheetos come October. The Rockets are in the playoffs for the first time in I don't know how long (truth be told, I couldn't care less about basketball). I guess no one in the front offices realized that teams that aren't doing well on the field (or at the gate) don't have much leverage when it comes to negotiating television deals.

If Mayor Parker were really interested in the plight of Astros and Rockets fans she'd put the blame where it belongs - on the teams themselves. These teams had new stadiums built for them with the public picking up the tab (damn those poor folks who are scamming the government to get our tax dollars so they can sit at home all day and not work). With those kind of subsidies, these teams should be operated as a public trust.

Instead the owners of both teams have shown themselves to be greedy little monsters out to squeeze every dollar from the fans they can.

Play ball!

The Criminal Defense Lawyer Invitational fantasy baseball league is set and ready to go. We've got six teams ready to do battle over the next six months.

The participants are Franklin Bynum (uhhhhhbbbbjeeeeeccct) and Scott Pope (Ball Busters) of the Harris County Public Defender's Office; Jamison Koehler (D.C. Jail Break) from our nation's capital; Vik Vij (State of Texas) from a certain district attorney's office on some little island south of Houston; Gideon (Gideon's Trumpet) from the hinterlands of Connecticut and yours truly (Paulie-Wogs).

Good luck to everyone and we'll see who's on top come October.

Still looking for fantasy baseball players

Okay, folks, it's time for one more final call for any attorneys out there looking to play a little fantasy baseball. We've got just a little over a week until the season gets under way and we need a few more teams to fill up the league.

If you're interested in signing up, it's the CrimDefLaw Invitational League at Yahoo!. The league ID is 134413 and the password is CDL2013 (I don't remember if it's upper case or lower case).

We'll be playing a standard scoring rotisserie league with an auto draft - just rank your players and sit back and wait.

Please don't make me beg for more players like a radio host on NPR begs for money.

Astros owner reveals his true inner being

Jim Crane, the owner of the Houston Astros, isn't a dummy. He's been a rather successful (ethical would be a very different question) businessman. That's what makes his latest misstep such a head scratcher.

No businessman worth his salt would buy into a business in which he stood no chance of making money. Whether that be cash flow or capital accumulation depends on the tastes of the businessman. Major League Baseball is awash in cash. According to Hardball Talk columnist Craig Calcaterra, the new deals with ESPN, Fox and TBS should net each club some $40 million a year beginning in 2014. That's money on top of local television rights and ballpark revenue.

The long and short of it is you have to really want to lose money not to make money in the long run owning a baseball team.

And Jim Crane wouldn't have bought the Astros if he didn't think he could make money like his predecessor Drayton McLane. Even if the club has a negative cash flow in the short run, the value of the club itself will appreciate over the long run.

For the upcoming season the Astros will have a payroll in the $25 million range. We're talking Kmart, folks. Crane and the Astros "braintrust" don't expect the team to even be competitive for another two years.

Now keep in mind that over the last year the Astros (along with the Rockets) launched a cable sports channel that is accessible to fewer than 100,000 folks in the Houston area (out of a population of just under 2 million). The Astros got greedy and are asking way too much in carriage fees for cable and satellite providers to carry the network. As a result, most folks will be unable to watch the Astros on the tube this year (with the exception of the season opener against the Rangers).

Crane and his crew also decided to up the ante with "dynamic pricing." As a result overall ticket prices have risen as the product on the field has gotten worse. Supposedly dynamic pricing is supposed to take into account the attractiveness of certain teams and ticket prices are supposed to fluctuate accordingly. Therefore, tickets for games against the Yankees, Red Sox and Rangers are more expensive - but, surprisingly enough, tickets for games against the Royals, Rays and other jetsam never fall below the regular price. Hmm. Funny how that works, Jim.

But now Crane has topped himself.

When asked by the Wall Street Journal about a comment by Los Angeles Dodger president Stan Kasten that he wouldn't be comfortable with the direction the Astros are headed, Crane lashed out at fans who were expecting the team to do more to make itself competitive.

“It doesn’t bother me that people want us to spend more money,” Crane told the Journal. “But it’s not their money. This is a private company, even though it’s got a public flair to it. If they want to write a check for 10 million bucks, they can give me a call.”

Yes, the Astros are a private company (despite the moniker "Houston" Astros), but they have also been on the receiving end of plenty of public money over the years, and to take the attitude that Crane has taken is beyond arrogant. It does, however, paint an accurate picture of who the man is and what he's about.

To Crane the Astros are a commodity. I am certain he will break down the revenue streams into minute detail and look for every way to raise more revenue and cut more expenses. He's not in it because he loves baseball, he's in it because he views a major league team as a cash cow he can milk for all its worth.

And, contrary to his continued statements that the Astros are losing money, he told the WSJ that he'll be making money this season.

Oh, it's going to be a long season.

Are you ready for some baseball?

Today I'm putting out an invite to all criminal defense attorneys out here in the blawgosphere who like fantasy baseball. Y'all are invited to sign up for the Criminal Defense Lawyers Invitational League over at Yahoo!

The league will be a rotisserie format with 5 X 5 scoring (standard fare in a Yahoo! league). We'll use an auto-draft so you'll need to rank your players (because there's no way in hell I'm going to sit in front of a computer screen for hours conducting a live draft).

If you're interested in signing up, just shoot me an e-mail, leave a comment or send me a tweet (@paulbkennedy) and I'll get the  information out to you. There are only 11 slots so you have to act fast.

Time is of the essence as the new season cranks up on the 31st at Minute Maid Park as the Disastros take on the Texas Rangers in their first game as a member of the American League.

Remember, it's just a fantasy, folks.

The dog days of April

For years some fans of the Houston Astros prayed that Drayton McLane would sell the team. After years of trading prospects for rental players the pipeline from the farm had dried up. After the Astros managed to reach the World Series with a first class pitching staff and a pathetic excuse for an offense, it was all downhill.

But those fans rejoiced when McLane sold the team to local businessman Jim Crane. It would be a new era for the Astros. Well, let's forget about the discrimination complaints filed with the EEOC against his company. Let's pretend the allegations regarding war profiteering never happened. Things were so bad that the MLB bigwigs agreed to look the other way and hand over $50 million if Crane would agree to end 50 years of tradition and move the Astros to the AL West.

Over the offseason we saw the re-branding of the Astros. They went back in time for the inspiration of the lame generic uniforms they'll be wearing this season. What Crane should have done was rename the team the Buffs as this squad seeks to continue the minor league baseball tradition in Houston.

Now maybe, just maybe, this whole rebuilding operation will pay off in the end. Get some good, cheap homegrown talent and throw a couple of big-time free agents into the mix and you might be able to compete with the big boys. The Tampa Rays have managed to field competitive teams using players they developed in the minor leagues. Of course once they want to get paid what they're worth the club will gladly trade them away for a handful of young prospects. The Oakland A's have managed to field competitive teams by developing their own players and by picking up the refuse from other clubs.

Only time will tell if the Astros will be able to achieve success down the road. On the other hand, they could end up like the Pittsburgh Pirates or the Kansas City Royals - teams that effectively serve as AAA affiliates for the rest of major league baseball. Neither club has had any appreciable success over the past two decades - is that what we're in for in the Bayou City?

So, as we sit here awaiting the start of the new season and contemplating a third straight 100-loss season, the mind stumbles, and trips over itself, contemplating the Astros' strategy for ticket sales. In the past, tickets were the same price day in and day out - the exception being a section or two whose prices fluctuated depending on who was in town.

Ever since my oldest daughter turned three I have taken her to Opening Day (except one year when they opened on the road). This season I purchased a seven-game ticket plan that included tickets for Opening Day against the Rangers. And it's a damn good thing I did because Crane has decided that the Astros are going to use "dynamic pricing" for every seat for every game. That means if you want to get a ticket for Opening Day you are going to spend two to three times (or more) what that seat would go for in ordinary circumstances.

This for a team that has been the worst in baseball the last two seasons.

What "dynamic pricing" actually means is that no one expects too many folks to come to the ballpark to watch the Astros. The team figures that fans will flock to the stadium depending on who the opponent is on any given day. In other words, "dynamic pricing" is just another way to say that the Astros are charging you to see the other team.

I would love to be optimistic about the upcoming season. I would love to be able to get behind a bunch of kids who should be playing AAA ball and watch them grow. But I see no reason for optimism. The pitching staff is weak. The offense isn't very good and the defense leaves a bit to be desired. Considering the number of games against the Rangers and the Angels this season, I have no reason to think the Astros will surprise anyone.

I suspect the dog days of August will be coming a bit early (again) this year.

The boys of summer are back

Today we hear the best four words during the winter - Pitchers and catchers report.

Sure, it's just the Astros who are giving us nothing to look forward to this season. They are looking at their third straight 100 loss season with no end to the misery in sight.

The problem is that the Astros spent too many years trying to figure out how to build the club. As I've written before, you can either build a club through homegrown talent down on the farm or you can spend a mint signing free agents. Develop your own talent and you can win on the cheap; rely on the free agent market and you'll be bleeding cash.

The Astros, on the other hand, tried to build a winning club by trading minor league prospects at the trade deadline for "rent-a-players" heading into free agency. The problem was the free agents weren't resigning with the club. The result was a depleted farm system. And, since the club didn't want to open up the wallet to buy proven talent, they always came up a bit short.

With nothing good down on the farm, and without the cash to sign A-list free agents, the only option was to strip the club down to the studs and try to rebuild. And what a painful project that has turned out to be.

But, being that it's baseball, the sun shines a bit brighter, the sky's a deeper shade of blue and the grass is soft under the feet. Even though I know better - it's time for baseball!